im staring and wondering and wandering and starting
and beginning to worry that all those things i want
are going to have to come by my own devices
and all those vices that keep me at bay
will never be released through the loving promptings
of another soul
it seems that this journey might be one that i have to go
alone
as it appears to me now that the more i try
to be me with someone
the more i become me with no one
or is it just that i am unable
to just let things be?
it might be the perfect combination of all these
as i type in the dark
waiting for answers to questions ive asked
far too long ago